As 2011 comes to an end it's a time for reflection on what moms got right, or almost got right, this year. As 2012 hurtles toward us it's also a great time to look ahead at the resolutions that will make the coming months memorable and successful. In the spirit of everyone's favorite late night talk show, it is time for Top 10 of New Year’s Resolutions for Patch Moms. No. 1: Patience  I will practice the lost of art by taking a deep breath and counting to ten.  I will view the time waiting on a line or sitting in medical office as not time lost but as an opportunity for me to sit in silence …

I was a recycled teen this weekend. A group of friends gathered to remember the good ol’ days when life was simple and carefree. Do you remember those days? It was called high school. No, it wasn’t the officially sanctioned reunion, that’s being planned for next year. This spur of the moment gathering was organized so we could share some history. No faux pas about not recognizing someone. I peaked at the RSVP list. Just an intimate gathering of high school pals. "Wow, it’s been twenty years!" "Great to see you! What’s new?" Wait, I already have some of the answers.   Thanks to Facebook, I've …

Thank you, Steve Jobs. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t be sitting on my laptop typing this column. You helped inspire me to have the courage to write, voice my opinion and pay little attention to outside noise. I remember reading the commencement speech Jobs delivered at Stanford University in 2005. It was not long after that he was diagnosed with cancer. His death resurrected his speech and the words meant to inspire. He told the audience three stories. The first about connecting the dots. The second about love and loss. The third about death. One sentiment of the speech struck a chord and …

Could you leave child alone in a foreign country in order to save their life? I recently read a book called In the Sea There are Crocodiles, which is based on the true story of an Afghan child named Enaiatollah Akbari. Enaiat’s mother abandons him in Pakistan to protect him from the Taliban. He is ten. He must use a decade's worth of knowledge to survive. She was not being cruel leaving him to instinct alone. This mother was saving her child. I am sure you felt like you were abandoning your child into some unknown world when you dropped them off at preschool or kindergarten this school year. …

Every cloudless, vibrant blue-skied day in September makes me think about that day. The day our generation lost its innocence and the world became a different place. This weekend marks the 10th anniversary of 9/11. There will be remembrances on television and ceremonies in communities. Some of our children were young when this atrocity happened and others were not yet conceived. It doesn’t matter if you were alive then; you are living the aftermath now. Our children think it’s normal to remove their shoes and have a pat down at the airport. They don’t know about travel before the 3 oz. rule. …

July and August are busy birthday months for my family. We have 11 of them to celebrate during the two month span. Eleven parties. Eleven candle-lit birthday cakes. Eleven birthday wishes. In August, it was the mother of all birthdays. That’s right. Our matriarch, my mom, turned 82. Our family and I have a lot to celebrate this year. Two years ago, as my husband I prepared a short tribute in honor of her 80th birthday, I found myself wondering how much and how well I really know this woman, my mother.   Among the many still shots we scanned and edited together was a photo of my mom as a …

My house looks like an earthquake hit. Drawers are open and clothes are spilling out. The cupboards have been ransacked and there is not a jar of peanut butter or granola bar in sight. The credit card is too hot to handle. I am hiding my favorite sweater. It is annual pillage of the house – the kids are off to college. This year I have two off to the "ivory tower" and they are leaving five days apart. When my daughter left two years ago there was a shortage of Kleenex in the area. I cried when I heard a song on the radio. I cried when I washed her clothes. I curled up in a ball on cried on …

Summer is about carefree pursuits and vacations on the beach. It’s sipping frozen drinks with the cute umbrellas.  My summer started that way but was soon eclipsed by sadness. As the sun shined brightly, I needed to talk about dying with my children. My sister lost her battle with brain cancer.    She was diagnosed in the fall and started treatment immediately. I was honest with the oldest three. I spoke plainly about the facts of her disease and told them her chances. The tears started to flow as we began to navigate this challenge.  I was not so truthful with my youngest. She is 10 and the …

The showdown had been threatening for hours. When it came down to it, it was my 2-year old son, me, a supermarket filled with harried shoppers and a manipulatively packaged, eight dollar, hunk of neon green goo. The set up had the feel of a shoot-out in a classic western movie. Except, instead of the OK Coral at high noon, we— my 2-year old and I— were at the A&P in Ortley Beach (close to where we once lived) in the late afternoon, perilously close to dinnertime. Specifically, we were on a long, slow checkout line. My son was exhausted and hungry. I was feeling my working-mother sleep …

I remember them as if they happened yesterday. Two women, experienced in the art and practice of motherhood, laying their truth on me. It happened the first time in early July, 1993. I was in the final days of my first pregnancy and I felt (and was) huge, so huge, that it was a task to walk from my parked car and into the video rental store in the heavy, hot summer afternoon. As I waddled my way across the strip mall parking lot, a child of about nine came screeching and wailing at me, nearly knocking me over. Her mom, a disheveled, tortured looking woman, was carrying a crying toddler in her…

A bit of trivia. In 1972 Father’s Day became a national holiday. It was first observed in 1910 to complement Mother’s Day. However, it took 62 years from the first celebration to become an official holiday. I wonder what the resistance was to honor dad for parenting?  Men primarily run Congress–wouldn’t they want another pat on the back? Is honoring a man for his part in raising children not “man” enough to celebrate? It was actually a woman who made the most noise to finally get dad some recognition for his role in parenting. Women are said to have a natural ability to nurture and mother. …

Don Johnson was cool on Miami Vice when he wore a white suit, but you are not wearing a white tuxedo to the prom when your girlfriend is wearing a white gown. Welcome to prom season. The pre-prom hoopla is a letdown when you are the mother of a boy.  I experienced prom girl preparation two years ago, and it was fun. Granted, girls get emotional and stressed. They will yell and cry, but I would take that drama over this low-rated sitcom. Prom boy prep is boring. We only went to one tuxedo shop, where he was measured, handed trousers and a jacket, and shown the fitting room. The shop owner …

It's just past 9:30 on a Saturday morning and I am holding onto a barre with all the strength I can gather. Our exercise instructor, Winnie, is pushing us all, and she is pushing us hard. “Just four more before we break out,” she says firmly but sympathetically and I feel my grip on the barre get even tighter. I glance across the studio to see my daughter’s eyes close with the effort and concentration and I feel the involuntary bloom of a smile on my face….replacing the grimace. She is 17 years old, she came home at midnight last night, and yet, here she is. My daughter and I started taking …

Memorial Day Weekend. A time to remember veterans as well as the unofficial start of summer. Interesting how both definitions involve memories and the way we honor them.  When you stop and think about some of your favorite memories I bet a majority occurred in the summer. Do memories happen naturally or do you create situations in hopes they birth to a memory? Did you make any memories this past weekend? My friend Beth teases me all the time, “Lynnie is making a memory.” Camera in hand, silliness packed, in search of a good time. “Smile and get together for a picture,” I said to our children…

Both my sons have said they have either seen a photo or received a photo in their teenage years of a girl showing a little too much skin. They are four years apart so this is not something new in 2011. What is new are repercussions, what is new is that it has a name –sexting. Boys will be boys. If they get a chance to look at a member of the opposite sex without some clothes on they will take it. Your grandfather had pinups during World War II. The 1950’s male passed around National Geographic Magazine to see topless ladies. The next generation found their dad’s Playboy Magazine hidden under …

We sometimes feel the need to correct their speech and their pronunciation of certain words – it's just a natural part of parenting. Get rid of those snakey 's' sounds and belt out a hard ''l". But when a child is in constant struggle or seems to be slightly behind in their vocabulary, when is there a need to engage in early intervention? To find out more about this subject, I spoke to Janet M. Krebs, Director of the Communication Therapy Center on South Maple Avenue in Glen Rock on the Ridgewood border. Krebs provides this kind of advice for a living, so she'd certainly be able to speak to …

“Mom, I just don’t want to go to puberty,”  my fourth grade daughter announced when she handed me the notice from the school nurse. It was time for the showing of “the film.”  I don’t want you to go to puberty either I wanted to say – you are my “baby.” I have been to that puberty place myself and it can be a little tricky at times. I reassured her that it would be ok. She burst into tears.  “I don’t want to see 'the film' or go to puberty.”  As I cuddled her on the couch, the brothers entered the family room and asked why she was sobbing on my chest. First I couldn’t believe they noticed, …

It changes you. The day I became a mother my life changed forever. It was no longer about my needs or wants but about the little bundle of joy in my arms. It was another vow to take. To love, cherish and protect. The love and cherish part came naturally.  You fell in love with that baby the minute you felt the first flutter. A secret between you and your child. You didn’t have to share it with anyone else. You cherished that life with eating healthy, exercising and ceasing the glass of wine. Protecting the baby started off easy enough. Swaddle them tightly in a blanket, cradle their head, …

I say it every morning. "Please text me when you get there."   My son's shoulders–already encumbered by a 95-pound backpack (I exaggerate a little), slump just a little more. This is his nonverbal way of protesting this imposition on his freedom. However, even now, in the final weeks of 8th grade, I insist. Truth is, he's taller, stronger, and faster than me and I walk all over town without a second thought about safety. I watch him as he walks away, shaking his head of thick brown curls in frustration with me. My daughter is a high school senior. She, too, must deal with me and my protective…

Following Glen Rock/Ridgewood’s recent drug bust the local news started communicating more on teenage drug abuse. When I read this story I thought not only about the teens, but how the parents would be feeling about their children being involved with recreational drugs. It got me thinking about how I would feel if my daughters got caught up in drug use and how we can communicate with our children to help steer them away from such temptations. Sabrina Coppola is the manager of Care Plus NJ, based in Fair Lawn. Care Plus offers "Parenting with Common Sense" programs to help parents learn …